Thinking of my Sister Renee

Thinking of my Sister Renee

She is having alot of nerve pain, and that is something I understand. For many years i didn’t talk too much about it, but for some reason this time in my life  i do feel like being more public. At first, most of my chronic pain was at night, my arms and hands would have some stabbing pains and be very tender during the day. At night, they felt like they were buzzing or overly awake. I couldn’t tolerate the blankets or covert touching them. I wore braces on both wrists and hands and had a method of using pillows so nothing would touch them. But, when i moved in my sleep, my hands and arms would wake me up.  Once I started a combination of sleep medication and anti-depressanst, I got pretty good sleep.  Then, because I felt “lesser” for taking the anti-depressants, i would try to go off of them. Well, I thought I was fine, but after some time, i would realize i was back in the same place, not sleeping , feeling more and more depressed and very helpless.  I could neither figure out exactly what was making me hurt nor what made me not hurt.  Over the years I have learned patterns that increase my pain. So, I avoid those patterns when realistic.

Of course,  no surprise, since I was working high-tech, repetitive motions,  was one of the patterns. I just would not stop eating popcorn, i just liked it too much.

 

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